Growing up? Lets do more than that!
Who am I?
This is the one question that almost everybody asks themselves at some point in their lives. Maybe many times. This certainly has been the case for me. Throughout my life I have reinvented myself depending on the situation, the circumstances, the friends I keep. But now that I have completed university and am preparing to enter “real life” it seems that I should become more than I was yesterday.
The idea of ‘more’ can be seen as a pretty obscure subject. ‘More’ can refer to simple quantity, so maybe I should gain more skills. ‘More’ can also mean get better, so I’ll run in place until I can run a marathon. Maybe ‘more’ is spiritual, or philosophical, maybe its only a simple placeholder that means “insert personal definition here”. Personally I feel like its a combination of everything, a simple conglomeration of mini improvements.
So back to my original idea. Change. In primary school I was the ‘chubby’ kid that, whilst generally liked – I believe, was never all that popular. I played sports, soccer and cricket mostly, my fitness was lacking but in the end I wasn’t half bad. On the whole though that was my existence, thats who I was. A simple kid, nothing special, who went to school achieved decent grades and played sports. It wasn’t enough. I moved to a new school for my senior years and I vowed things would change. Moving to a new school represents the perfect opportunity to reinvent yourself. In actuality, I think it’s harder, whilst building yourself over you need to maintain an everyday life, but with a little determination you can succeed. I wanted more, maybe I just wanted to be more.
Keeping busy is the easiest way to stop your mind thinking about what it really wants.
I started my days at 6:00 ended them around 9:30, in hindsight it’s surprising how much work you can actually do whilst in bed. I jumped from one activity to the next for days on end. I learned how to SCUBA dive and play the bass, I learned first aid, took up debating and even joined the Nature Awareness club. I was constantly busy, and more often than not too tired to think. At the end of it, sure I made a contribution, yes I had helped and changed some peoples lives, including my own. But I wasn’t really satisfied, at the time I thought I wanted recognition. Now thats its just a distant memory, recognition doesn’t really seem all that important. Who honestly still cares what your final English grade was or whether you received a distinction for Accountancy. Who genuinely cares about colours or merit badges; don’t get me wrong I feel proud of my achievements, but they really mean very little in who I am as a person and, more importantly, who I want to be.
Make a choice. “Making up your own mind, is the one thing you can do for yourself. So try it sometime.”
I think what it really comes down to is that I want to keep improving. I don’t really have a particular goal in mind but I am continuously growing and doing things that make me happy. Fire-spinning wont help me in my career, since I have decided not to join a circus, and speaking Italian won’t necessarily be as useful as Hindi or Mandarin, but fire-spinning looks cool and Italy is an incredible country that I would love to visit again. I have decided to grow and keep enjoying my growth whatever it may be. I won’t grow up to a schedule or try to become something “appropriate”. I think people should make a decision and improve themselves, in anyway that they want. For the moment, I’m learning about blog writing but who knows whats next. I suggest you try and do the same.